Zolf Smith is a dwarven cleric, formerly of Poseidon. He describes his new religion as "not hope, exactly" and says that he does not know why he can still cast in Violent Reactions.



Zolf Smith is a wise but gruff dwarven cleric of Poseidon, and the leader of The Rangers.

As the group's leader, Zolf does his best to keep the group on task, making sure his teammates stay focused and their employers come through with timely payment.

Zolf is older than the rest of the party, being somewhere around 50 (essentially around 30 in dwarf years), and has had several careers in his life. He is a religious dwarf, converting after a near-death experience. He does grow to question his faith as events unfold.


Zolf used to be a sailor and pirate, and he lost his left leg to a misadventure during his seafaring days. His leg was replaced with a metal peg leg. A rather grizzled, salty sea-dog. Wears cheap off the peg scale armour, and a large brown oilskin coat. Blond haystack hair, green eyes, beard is like a pair of muttonchops that have gotten way out of hand and have been braided.

In combat, he wields a shield and trident (the favoured weapon of his deity) and has a driftwood dolphin as his holy symbol.

Changes in Appearance

Loses his second leg in Rock Bottom, and finds metal ports in his legs, where Mr Ceiling offers to attach new legs.

In In Seine in the Membrane, Zolf receives briny water legs from Poseidon.

Upon returning to the party in Tadaima, Zolf's hair is snow white and shorter, and his beard is now in one big plait down the middle, tied together with a golden circlet with an emerald set in it. He wears breastplate armour with engravings, but it does not have any Poseidon iconography on it, and does not have his driftwood dolphin. Additionally, in Violent Reactions, he reveals in he no longer has the water legs that Poseidon gave him, but rather prosthetics made with technology from the Simulacrum.

Puncture wound on right temple from spike in Blobs, Spikes, Spiders & Booms. Looks like a bullet wound.


Hamid Saleh Haroun al Tahan

Sasha Racket

Bertrand MacGuffingham

Cel Sidebottom


  • Trident
  • Heavy Wooden Shield (which floats)
  • Scale Mail
  • Mace
  • Adventuring kit, Mining lantern, Compass and Whistle
  • Rapier (looted in ep 56)
  • Glaive (RQG 128 - Tadaima)



Zolf and his family worked as tin miners in the town of Herefordshire (near to Somerset). His father, Hirald Smith, was a brilliant tactician and strategist in the Harlequins, but after the Harlequins began to be associated with the separatists (and tactics began to get a bit more violent), Hirald seemingly retired from the Harlequins and became a miner, expecting both of his sons to follow in his footsteps. Zolf, however, was not a fan of mining, finding it boring, and did not want to be a miner along with the rest of his family. 

At some point, Feryn also joined the Harlequins; although Hirald wasn’t enthused about his son joining the group, he did not stop him. Feryn’s ring (which Zolf wears in the campaign) is a symbol of belonging to the Spades, one of the branches of the Harlequins. Zolf was unaware that either of them were members of the Harlequins, and it is unknown if his mother had any stakes in the group. 

Zolf’s brother and parents all died prior to the campaign beginning. Feryn was killed in a cave-in, but the cause of death for his mother and father is not stated.


In episode 153, Zolf reveals something that he has never told anyone: he accidentally killed his brother, Feryn. When he and Feryn were working in the mines one day, Zolf was bored and kicked out at one of the posts, causing a cave-in in the mine. Feryn was killed in the collapse, and Zolf blamed himself for the entire situation.

After this, about 13 years before the campaign began, Zolf left home and joined up with the navy. Six years before the campaign began, the ship Zolf worked on was shipwrecked in a unusually terrible storm off the coast of Norway. The official records show that the ship collided with a rock outcropping, but there are conflicting stories from the three survivors. Ten crew members were confirmed dead, 25 were marked missing in action, two are still in service in the navy (Tallulah and Jonah), and one (the captain, Samael) retired. Zolf himself almost died in the wreck, and woke up on a piece of driftwood. He was picked up by a pirate ship that he then worked on for a few more years. While working on the ship, there was an incident in which he lost his leg, about three years before the campaign started. Eventually, Zolf left the pirate ship, returning to London and starting his own mercenary company.


London and Other London

At the beginning of the show, Zolf is working with Figgis to hire new members for the mercenary company that he is the leader of. Bertie is the first member that he hires, after having turned away a young kid who doesn’t seem to have any relevant skills, and then the three of them head off to begin crowd control around Thomas Edison’s mansion, on behalf of Sergeant Richard Haringay. It’s clear that Haringay and Zolf have some sort of history, and seem to be amicable. 

On the way there, they run into Sasha, who is escaping two thugs who are trying to force her to come back to Other London, and they summarily trounce them. After the fight is over, a crowd has rocked up, and that’s when Hamid steps in, helping them to convince the crowd it was all a joke. Zolf hires both of them on the spot and they all begin to work crowd control at Edison’s.

Zolf notices the waitstaff acting strange before others do, and then the lectern at the front of the room explodes, killing most of the people in the room. Zolf and the rest of the party start to fight the group of arsonists, but they either escape or are killed before they can be questioned. The party continues to follow the trail left behind by the arsonists, and they end up in the sewers. Zolf spots pieces of the Simulacrum in the sewage and jumps into the water to retrieve it. He’s successful, but he does get pulled further down into the drainage system, prompting Hamid to help him climb out with some rope. 

After walking further down through the sewers until they nearly run into Other London, they decide to return the parts of the Simulacrum to Haringay and figure out what they need to do next. They head to the Central Precinct, the local police station, and go to speak with Haringay, revealing everything they found in the sewers. Zolf and Hamid take turns explaining, and then Haringay pays them for the information, requesting that they continue into Other London to see if they can find out anything about the arsonists or the simulacrum. Sasha is visibly upset at the idea of going to Other London, and Zolf pulls her away to try and figure out why she doesn’t want to go down there. He’s brusque, and Sasha doesn’t answer his direct questions, but he puzzles out that she has a history there, and more or less tells her that they still have to go, as this is their new mission. She agrees, although it’s clear that she isn’t happy, and they all head back to Hamid’s to rest before heading to Other London.

The next morning, the party stocks up and makes their way to Other London; Zolf looks like he could easily be from Other London. The group is beset by a group of men, who all seem to have some sort of history with Sasha. Zolf tries to defuse the fight before it can start, saying that there’s no need for it, but no one listens. The fight doesn’t go well; they’re outnumbered by the men and the dogs. Hamid and Bertie are knocked unconscious, and Zolf is deafened. He listens to Sasha when she repeats the orders the men give, and he and Sasha follow along behind the men as they escort the entire party further into Other London. Bertie and Hamid, both still unconscious, are carried along. Eventually, they come upon a mansion and head in, meeting with Barret Rackett, Sasha’s uncle. He and Sasha speak for a while, and then he offers them a copper ring; Zolf is hesitant to let anyone take it, saying they don’t know what it is, and then before any of them can do anything, Hamid takes the ring. Zolf isn’t pleased, but since the ring is magic, there’s not an easy way for them to get it off. Barret hands Zolf a map after Hamid has taken the ring, explaining that it will take him to the arsonist’s base. The party leaves, following the map as they head further into Other London.

They stop in at an inn for the night; Zolf buys them all a round of alcohol while they all order meals, and they discuss their plans for the next day. Zolf heals all of them while they’re there, and once they’ve finished, they all head to bed.

The next morning, they make their way through Other London to the base of the arsonists, and decide to lure the two guards away from the complex and attack so that they can easily sneak into the complex. It’s easy enough; the party attacks them, and Zolf and Sasha begin interrogating the sole member still conscious. Zolf manages to wrangle out that they work for a group called the Serpentines, and then they learn more about the group and their motives. 

Once the interrogation is over, Zolf announces his intentions to drown the two guardsmen - as a cleric of Poseidon, he is expected to provide tributes to the god in return for the magic that Poseidon provides. The rest of the party is staunchly against Zolf drowning them, and they argue about this until Zolf finally gives in, telling them that he may struggle to heal them in the future because of this decision. Mollified, they all move on, discussing the plan for breaking into the compound. The fight doesn’t last long, as everyone inside the complex is handled by the party. Zolf, heading up the stairs, accidentally triggers an explosion, and throws himself backwards onto Hamid, protecting him from the blast. They both retreat, along with Bertie, and then Zolf sets the building on fire before he begins to stabilise Guy Fawkes, the leader of the arsonists. The fire doesn’t burn for long before Zolf puts it out, allowing Sasha time to grab the notebook on the upper floor with the evidence in it.  

They search the rest of the complex, and then Sasha goes off on her own to inspect a small shed, where an explosion goes off. Zolf hears the boom, and starts running toward the wreckage, panickedly trying to find her. He puts the fire out and eventually finds her laying a ways away from the shed. He heals her, begging to Poseidon to give him more power, and, when that doesn’t do as much as he’d like, gives her his healing potion and she wakes. Relieved, he goes to tie Guy Fawkes up, and then they begin to head back to Other London. They go to the official entrance, where Zolf drops Haringay’s name, and they are able to return to London quickly. They go back to the police station and show Guy to Haringay. Once the interrogation of Guy is over, Zolf offers to take care of her for Haringay (namely, drown her) but Haringay declines. Instead, he slugs her, and she passes out.  

They recover overnight, and then return to the station, where Lady Starling - the new head of the Meritocratic forces, gives them a new contract with the Meritocracy to investigate the Simulacrum.

Season 1


 The party heads to Bi Ming Gusset’s antique shop to get some more leads on some of the clues that they found in the notebook. While there, Gusset recognises Zolf’s signet ring, comparing it to Rakefine’s - the emblem is similar. Sasha immediately thinks that this is one of Barret’s plots, and that he’s behind all this, which Zolf tells her isn’t true. Gusset grabs Zolf’s hand to get a closer look. Zolf isn’t happy about this, but does eventually let Gusset examine the ring, at which point Gusset realises that it isn’t Rakefine’s, and asks if Zolf knows the history of the emblem on the ring. Zolf says that the ring came from his hometown, and says that he doesn’t care about the history of the ring. While they’re waiting in the back room, Hamid asks if Zolf wants to talk about the ring, but Zolf shuts it down, clearly not eager to talk about his past. 

They leave Gusset’s shop and head to the British Museum to speak with the curator there and see if there’s more they can find out about the clues in the notebook. There's a brief skeleton fight in which Zolf slays the Skeleton King to end the battle, and then heals the party afterwards. After some issues with Bertie's lawyers, Zolf asks him if this is going to impact their party at all, but Bertie just brushes it off. Hamid then confesses that he was kicked out of university, and when Zolf asks why, Hamid says he doesn’t want to talk about it. 

When asked to speak to the press, Zolf and Sasha come up with the name The London Rangers as their temporary mercenary group name, with the final decision being The London Rangers (We’re Still Working On The Name). 

After the museum, the Rangers head to the Tahan bank branch in London, trying to see which branch the safety deposit key belongs to, and if they will be able to access it. The manager adheres to bank rules, even when Hamid brings up that he is a Tahan, and so Bertie and Zolf successfully intimidate him into providing them with information. When the party gives chase to Figgis, disguised as Byron, a chase ensues but Zolf stays back at the bank, steadily getting more and more drunk from the whiskey. When the party returns with Figgis in tow, Zolf is properly sloshed, and waits outside the bank room, beginning to fence with his peg leg against Bertie. As they go to leave, he takes a step forward, forgetting his peg leg is off, and falls flat on his face.

The party recovers overnight - Zolf doesn’t have much of a hangover when he wakes the next morning, luckily, and they all decide to head out to Kew Gardens and see if they can meet with Doctor Mendeleev and learn more about the seed they found in the notebook. Once they arrive, Zolf notices Sasha is uncomfortable with how open the space is, and offers her his coat to put over her head.

When looking for Mendeleev in the Kew Gardens basement, the party is set upon by a swarm of bugs. After Bertie gets knocked out, Zolf stabilises him, and then goes to find Hamid. He finds him close to the extremely cold mould, and uses his trident to carefully pull him away from the mould. Once he’s out and the layer of frost has disappeared from Hamid’s skin, Zolf picks him up and walks back to where Brutor and Bertie lay, dropping him on top of the pile. He heals all of them, but the healing is less effective than it should be - he’s clearly starting to fall out of favour with Poseidon. Bertie becomes conscious but Hamid doesn’t, so Zolf tries slapping him awake. When this doesn’t work, he gets ready to carry Hamid out of the room as they try to escape, but Bertie notices Brutor laying on the other side of Hamid, and he begins to have a breakdown, clutching at Brutor’s body. However, Zolf gets Bertie moving, having him pick up Brutor while Zolf carries Hamid to the next room, where he tosses him on top of a crate.

Sasha goes to investigate, and then returns, spooking Zolf to the point where he almost attacks her on instinct. Bertie is clearly eager to leave, but Zolf refuses, saying that they need to finish up their mission. He eggs Bertie on, convincing him to stay and be a hero, and then directs Sasha to investigate a bit more. She doesn’t seem that eager, but does listen, and they see another plant creature. Zolf outlines a plan to beat the creature, and the party all get into position. The fight itself doesn’t last long, and then they return to Hamid and Brutor. Zolf, who’s all out of healing spells, and Bertie is reminded by Sasha that he has a healing potion. He struggles over whether he wants to give it to Hamid or Brutor more, and when he won’t give it to Hamid, Zolf walks over and knocks Brutor’s body off of the crate, ordering Bertie to give the potion to Hamid. While Bertie does that, Zolf checks to make sure Brutor is actually dead, and realises that he’s just unconscious. Furious at Bertie, he stabilises the dog, asking him why he didn’t think to check for a pulse. 

Hamid, realising that Brutor isn’t dead either, hands Bertie a healing potion; Zolf tells Bertie that they aren’t going to waste it on the dog, but Bertie ignores him and heals Brutor. With the entire party conscious again, they keep moving. They investigate a little bit more, but don’t find anyone or any information. Zolf is ready to pack it up and head back to the surface and then continue on to Paris when they hear Morse code being tapped out against the pipes. They decide to search for whoever it is, but Zolf is trying to avoid the monster-infected rooms. This causes an argument between Zolf and Hamid; Hamid wants to fight off the monsters, and wants to be a hero, but Zolf wants to keep them all alive. Zolf wants to leave and let the authorities deal with the horrors lurking under Kew Gardens, while Hamid wants to explore the rest of the place themselves and save anyone they can. 

He explains that Poseidon is angry with him Hamid walks away, and Sasha and Zolf hang back, walking behind Hamid and Bertie. They find another room and enter it, running into a dead body. Sasha asks if Zolf would be able to drown some of the mandrake things that killed the person, but Zolf says no. Hamid asks what they should do next, and Zolf gives him the reins to the mission, saying that if Hamid wants to be a hero, he can. He’ll listen to whatever Hamid tells him to do; he isn’t being intentionally belligerent, and is sincerely going to listen to what Hamid says. They continue to head through the basement, following the tapping, and finally find a the man who has been tapping on the pipes behind a glass tank. Hamid gets spores blown into his face and basically becomes catatonic; Zolf notices and checks that he’s alright, but doesn’t know how to fix it. They fight off the plant monster for a bit and then, once it’s fallen, the man leaves the tank, identifying himself as Doctor Mendeleev. Zolf digs out one of the corpses and has Dr. Mendeleev identify the mould. 

With Mendeleev found, the party makes their escape from the basement; they return to the ground floor. He looks at the seed as they ask, and mentions that they will need to go to Svalbard, specifically the seed bank, to learn more. Svalbard is the gateway to the Dwarven realm, and he asks if Zolf has ever been there. Zolf says that he hasn’t, and Mendeleev mentions that Svalbard will not be accepting to non-dwarves. After getting this intel, Mendeleev gives funds to the party, which Zolf correctly identifies as a bribe - he isn’t happy about it, but doesn’t turn it down. They do take it, in the end, and make a quick trip to the bank to deposit the funds into their accounts before returning to Hamid’s. 

Upon making it back to the flat, they notice that the door is open, and enter, meeting Oscar Wilde for the first time. He is aware of most of the party’s movements since Edison’s, although Zolf tries to stonewall him and not reveal anything more. Eventually, they all come to an understanding, although Zolf clearly doesn’t like Wilde any more than he did, threatening to drown him if any sensitive information gets out. Wilde boops him on the nose, which Zolf reacts to by headbutting him in the chest. Then, Bertie punches Zolf, laying him out. Wilde finally leaves, and Zolf gets to his feet, displeased with Bertie but not addressing it further. 

The conversation turns to Kew Gardens; Zolf isn’t happy that they took the bribe and are letting the higher-ups at Kew get away with everything that happened there. Sasha is on his side, but Hamid doesn’t share this opinion, saying that they needed to stay and help where they could. Zolf still thinks that they should have left and found professionals, but Hamid counters that, saying that it would have taken too long. Zolf tells Hamid that he can’t get hung up on the what-ifs, and they both argue about the morality of having taken the bribe; Zolf (and Dr. Mendeleev) viewed it as a bribe to not share what really happened, but Hamid sees it as a reward as opposed to anything else. They don’t really reach an agreement, but eventually Zolf says that, regardless of everything else, he doesn’t want them to get killed, as he is the one who is responsible for them. Hamid agrees with him to try and be less reckless in future. 

The next morning, the party heads to Dover via train (first class). 

[still in progress]

Season 2

Zolf is spinning in circles at the beginning of season 2, and spends most of his time alone in his room at the hotel brooding. He’s feeling guilty over shutting down Mr. Ceiling, both because the action broke a number of the world’s economic systems and because he isn’t completely convinced that it was fully evil or could be redeemed. After having injured his only remaining leg in the catacombs and having it removed by Mr. Ceiling, he’s confined to a wheelchair and conflicted about whether or not he should use the metal legs or wait for Poseidon to provide him with some.

He spends most of the first day trying (unsuccessfully) to commune with Poseidon and get some sort of answer about the legs, and Hamid and Bertie walk in on Zolf crying afterward. Hamid and Zolf argue about the situation, with Hamid trying to convince Zolf that they’re only four people, and don’t have enough power to completely change the way the world works, as Zolf seems to have feared. Zolf retorts that its the powerlessness that he fears, describing how useless he’s felt at trying to do nearly everything since shutting down Mr. Ceiling. He feels guilty for not being able to help in the power room, and having to be carried around by Sasha, and doesn’t know how he will actually be able to help the team the way he is. 

After the argument, Zolf returns to his room, not speaking to anyone, and ignores Hamid, who spends the night sitting outside of his room, crying slightly. He has a dream; Poseidon appears to him in a dream, being unclear as always, and Zolf stares him down, refusing to bow to him. He’s thrown into the water at the end of the dream, and wakes up, throwing a glass through the window in his room in frustration. Hamid hears the noise and rushes in, but Zolf ignores him, hiding under the covers and refusing to speak until Hamid comes and sits next to him. Zolf is sulky throughout the conversation, stonewalling Hamid even as he tries to help Zolf focus more on the positives instead of wallowing in the mistakes he’s made. 

Zolf doesn’t leave his room for the rest of the day, and has another dream; again, it’s unclear, but Zolf reaches out and takes Poseidon’s hand. He wakes up with a searing pain in his legs, shouting, and Hamid rushes in to see the sink in the bathroom flooding over as Zolf is screaming in pain. He pulls the covers off, and Zolf realises that the water from the sink has made it all the way over to the bed and reformed into water legs.

Zolf leaves his room, fielding questions about his new legs, and then they all decide to try and leave Paris, among the riots. Zolf, on the way out, pulls Hamid back, and apologises for the way he’s been acting. It’s gruff, but heartfelt, and Hamid says that Zolf’s been given the legs so that he can choose what’s next; Zolf doesn’t seem to agree, and it’s clear that he’s still harboring a lot of guilt from a number of different situations. He doesn’t think he deserves the legs. 

As they begin to flee Paris, Zolf is very on-edge, with no patience for Wilde’s snark as he joins back up with the party. He tries to stop Hamid from going toward La Gourmande, but Hamid argues with both him and Wilde until a team of assassins shows up, clearly going after Wilde. Zolf is unamused through the whole fight, frustrated and annoyed with the situation. He has more flexibility than before, since he now has two working legs, and spares no mercy for the assassins. He tries to check what poison has been used on Wilde, but is unable to puzzle it out and the party retreats into a nearby locksmith’s shop. He and Sasha begin to interrogate one of the gnome assassin’s that they were able to capture; Zolf refuses to humor Bertie’s idea of torturing the gnome, and eventually they get the story out of him (with Hamid translating for Zolf, since the gnome is speaking French). After they get the information, Zolf advocates for killing the gnomes that are still alive, but the other party members disagree with this plan and they decide to leave them tied up. 

Zolf and Hamid take the first watch shift, and discuss some of the weird abilities and spells that Hamid has been showing recently. Zolf isn’t completely sure what it is, and wonders aloud if Hamid’s started unknowingly worshipping a god, as that’s the only method he is aware of for getting power without learning spells or magic. The watch ends, and both go to sleep. 

Upon waking, Zolf is informed by Sasha that there are multiple people surrounding them, and they need to find a way out. Zolf works on this, and then they reconvene as a group, discussing what should be done with the gnomes. Everyone argues different outcomes and Zolf, to settle matters, stabs them both through the neck. He then recommends that Wilde be put in the bolthole to be safe, and everyone else agrees with his decision, even if they aren’t happy that he killed their hostages. 

After Hamid has let the man knocking on the door in, Zolf is hostile, asking what he wants and telling him that they don’t know where Wilde is or why he’s important, and that even if they did, they wouldn’t allow Wilde to be tortured for information. Hamid kills the man, and a fight breaks out. Zolf alternates between healing the rest of the party and attacking where they can, and eventually all of them follow Sasha out of the back door, avoiding archers on the way. 

They split up, with Sasha, Zolf, and Wilde going one way while Bertie and Hamid go another. Sasha is knocked unconscious, but Zolf wakes her up and she runs back to help Hamid with Bertie while Zolf and Wilde work on taking out the rest of the attackers. Wilde is fundamentally useless for the fight, and Zolf is clearly frustrated with him, even kicking him when he fails to cast anything. 

The party finally reunites and they keep escaping, while Wilde escapes. Zolf is still very on-edge, but convinces Wilde to provide them with funds for when they land in Prague so that they can get kitted out and restock their potions stores. They successfully make it to the aeroport, where Zolf threatens two gnomes to let them onto the ship without having to pay. They eventually come to an agreement, and buy tickets for the airship flight to Prague. Wilde is not allowed to come, being physically kicked off of the ship by the captain, but the rest of the party continue on, and he promises to meet them in Prague. 


Traveling by airship is not something Zolf seems thrilled by; he has a grim look on his face as they board the ship, and it’s almost immediately clear why. The moment they take off, Zolf gets airsick, and spends most of their takeoff leaning over the side and vomiting. He stays above deck for most of the trip to Prague.  

At one point, the captain, Amelia Earhart, pulls a gun on Sasha and demands to know why they were traveling with Wilde. Zolf comes over to try to defuse the situation and explain why they were with him without revealing that they’re Meritocratic agents, and lands on the half-truth that Wilde was Bertie’s ex-lover, refusing to expand. During this confrontation, Amelia notices Zolf’s ring, and asks for his brother and father’s names. Zolf answers and is confused by why Amelia seems to know them, and she invites the entire party to dinner. 

Over dinner, she explains that the ring Zolf has bears the symbol of the Spades, a branch within the Harlequins (a rebel group that is dedicated to taking down the Meritocracy). She tells Zolf that his father was an important tactician and strategist for the Harlequins; once the group became more tied together with the separatist movement, however, he had left and cut his ties with the group. Unbeknownst to Zolf, his brother had also become a member; Hirald hadn’t wanted him to join, but hadn’t stopped Feryn from doing so. Feryn’s exact role in the organization is unclear. 

Zolf isn’t completely sure how to take this news; his family is all dead, so this is something he’s learning about them posthumously, and he’s currently working on behalf of the Meritocrats, an organization that his parents and brother worked against. It causes a lot of internal conflict, with him feeling even more lost and confused than before. 

He sleeps on it, after having watched the aftermath of Guivre glassing Eiffel’s Folly, and wakes up the next morning to go sit in the exact center of the lounge and do his best not to look around. Sasha finds him there, and asks him to go somewhere more private so that she can ask him about a medical problem. Zolf learns that Sasha’s been waking up covered in blood, and she wants to know what it could possibly be. He isn’t able to puzzle out what it is, exactly, but says that it’s most likely a strange, degenerative illness, but that as long as Sasha stays with him, she’ll be alright. Sasha doesn’t seem cheered by the news, and so Zolf seeks out Amelia, asking if she has any medical texts that he could look through. She doesn’t have many, but while he’s in her cabin, she presses him a bit more on the Harlequins. 

Zolf more or less refuses to engage with this line of conversation, reminding her that he didn’t know they existed before this, and Amelia lets it go. She offers to help provide equipment and food to Zolf and his friends, saying that Harlequins help Harlequins, but Zolf declines, not wanting to be in debt to an organisation he knows next-to-nothing about. He does offer his services as a cleric for the duration of the trip. 

The next day, Zolf tries to pull the entire team together to discuss what their next steps will be when they dock in Prague, but Sasha is nowhere to be found. He goes to search for her, and eventually finds her sitting with Harrison Campbell on the deck; Zolf doesn’t realise that it’s Harrison Campbell, and is curt but polite as he gets Sasha to follow him for a team meeting. They discuss the fact that Amelia offered to help them, and Zolf explains his reasoning, which Hamid and Sasha accept but don’t agree with. 

During this conversation, Bertie wonders aloud about Harrison Campbell being on the ship, and Zolf has a slight freak-out when he realises that the author he idolises is on the same ship as he is. He and Bertie argue about Campbell, and even Hamid gets involved, being very dismissive of Campbell’s status as a good author. Zolf, frustrated and angry, storms off to the lounge, ignoring Hamid even as Hamid sits in the lounge, reading a Campbell book he found. 

At some point, Zolf sees Campbell swing in front of the window, attached to the ship by a guideline, and runs out of the lounge up to the deck, nearly frothing at the mouth with how furious is. When he learns that Bertie is the cause, both Sasha and Amelia come over to try to talk him out of murdering Bertie. He doesn’t listen, blind with rage, and tries to cut Bertie’s guideline. The crew of the ship has to come over and hold him back, but he breaks out of their grip and only stops when Amelia points a gun at his head. He’s still furious at Bertie, and begins listing out all the times he’s endangered the lives of people Zolf cares about and loves, but he’s only talked down when Sasha tells him that killing Bertie would make Hamid upset. As a compromise, Amelia lets Bertie swing under the ship for a while. 

When Bertie finally makes it back on deck, Zolf starts to yell at him, threatening Bertie until Bertie challenges him to a duel. Zolf, wisely, does not accept the terms and, ignoring a lot of yelling coming from the back of the ship, fires Bertie. (This interaction is the last time that Zolf speaks to Bertie.) They notice that Bertie’s lawyer gnomes have shown up amongst all the arguing, and Amelia pulls Sasha, Hamid, and Zolf into her office, where Zolf explains the situation and explains that he’s fired Bertie. He doesn’t listen as Sasha and Hamid try to get him to reconsider, and leaves. On his way back to his room, he overhears Hamid and Bertie talking, and gives Hamid a hurt look as Hamid insults the Campbell books, but walks away before saying anything, not listening as Hamid tries to apologise. 

They spend the night in silence; upon waking up, Sasha asks Zolf to heal her, as she’s started bleeding again, and they realise that they’re getting closer to Prague. Zolf avoids Bertie and leaves the ship with Sasha. Amelia tells him that he’s always welcome back, as Harlequins help Harlequins, and Zolf thanks her for the help. She informs him that Prague is Spades territory, and warns him to be careful, but Zolf brushes off her warnings. 

He asks Hamid and Sasha if they’re coming with him, and neither of them seem willing to choose sides - Sasha suggests getting Bertie out of the way before he can cause a scene, and Hamid wants to have a conversation about everything. Hurt, Zolf storms off, showing the border agents the Meritocratic papers that Wilde had provided them with. He ignores Hamid as he chases after him, and doesn’t speak with anyone else. Despite having never been to Prague before, Zolf manages to find a distillery and starts drinking as Hamid and Sasha try to find him. Hamid finds him first, heading into the distillery after him, and Sasha follows, but hides up in the rafters after sneaking in through the ceiling.

An increasingly-tired Zolf tells Hamid that he needs to leave the party, citing an inability to work with Bertie and the fact that if one more thing happens to him, he will break. He’s disappointed in himself for trying to kill Bertie, and says that he’s cracked under the pressure of the past few weeks; after losing his sole remaining leg, the entire ordeal with Mr. Ceiling, the reveal that his father and brother were working against the Meritocracy, and losing faith in his god, he just can’t do it anymore. He no longer trusts himself to be a leader, and doesn’t think Hamid or Sasha should either. Sasha comes down from the rafters, startling Hamid. 

Zolf says again that he needs to leave, and Hamid tells him that he doesn’t want him to leave; Sasha doesn’t either, but tells him that no one should be forced to stay somewhere they don’t want to. He sticks by his decision to leave, and gives Hamid the information to access their Meritocratic contract and their bank account. Hamid hugs him, and Zolf hugs back, before leaving the pub, telling Hamid and Sasha that payment enough was meeting them. (This is the last time that Zolf speaks to Sasha.)


Zolf leaves the party in Prague, feeling lost and confused and on the edge of a breakdown. He wanders around Eastern Europe for a while, looking for some sort of purpose, and on this journey stops being a cleric of Poseidon after having not spoken with the cult in a while. He loses his water legs, but has new, metal ones, built from the remains of Simulacrum tech. However, even though he is not of the church of Poseidon, he’s still able to use magic for some reason. 

In the time before the infection hits, he decides to go and work with the Harlequins. While there, he learns more about what his father and brother did with the organization; his father was not a full member with the organisation, but was more of a logistical freelancer, but doesn’t share what his brother’s role was. The Harlequins send him out on a mission to research the strange weather phenomena occurring around the globe. While out on this mission, he runs into Wilde again after hitting a dead end on his own research.  He, Barnes, and Howard Carter become Wilde’s “B-team”, researching more about the infection. They end up in Japan, working out of an inn. 

At some point during the 18 months, he writes, but doesn’t send, letters to Sasha, Hamid, and Bertie. These letters are available to $10 donors on Patreon.

Season 4

Shipwreck, cult of Poseidon Formation of the Rangers Loss of other leg Angst Fight with Bertie Left for some soul searching

Additional Information

  • prepared caster


Languages: English, Dwarven, Ancient Greek

  • Profession sailor
  • Salt-beard
  • Healing
  • Endure Elements
  • Mechanically Sad (Grief-filled)
  • Not good at acrobatics, stealth and climbing


  • +2 save against poison
  • +4 combat manoeuvre defence against Bullrush and Trip
  • +2 appraise on all treasure found in or under water
  • +2 perception stone-based works, traps and doors
  • +2 sea survival
  • Dark vision (60 ft)
  • +1 to attack and +2 to dodge against aquatic and water types


  • Iron Will

Special Abilities:

  • Worship Poseidon (domains are water and islands)
  • Stepping stones
  • Icicle

Zolf's domain spells are: Obscuring Mist, and Air Bubble


  • Arcana
  • History
  • Nobility
  • Planes
  • Religion

Post Timeskip

Bull's strength Freedom's Call (Liberation Domain)

Main Ability Scores

Stat Level 1 Level 2 Level 3 Level 4 Level 5 Level 8
Hit Points 11 82
Strength 12 16
Dexterity 11
Constitution 16
Intelligence 12
Wisdom 18
Charisma 8
Fortitude Save 5
Reflex Save 0
Will Save 8
Initiative 0
Base Attack Bonus 0(?)


Trident: 1

Post Timeskip Magic glaive


  • "The only law that I... adhere to is the law of my god, and my god demands that eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. Justice and balance in things." (RQG 13)
  • "Having finished both his whiskeys, he wanders off in search of more." (RQG 20)
  • (Drunkenly, to Hamid) "Alright Squeaky McShortarms, we'll do what you say." (RQG 20)
  • (About Oscar Wilde) "He did have a really nice bum." (RQG 25)
  • (In response to being asked if he's served in the navy) "I've been on board... boats." (RQG 27)
  • (To Hamid) "Do a grief later, deal with problem now." (RQG 50)
  • “Okay, so, Harrison Cambell, right? He writes, just, the most amazing romance novels! Like, seriously, you need- [stammers with excitement].” (RQG 63)
  • “Uh, no, I think you’ll find With the Passion of the Sun is the greatest romance novel ever written!” (RQG 63)
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